


Predation

by Lise



Series: Gehenna [6]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Asphyxiation, BDSM, Bondage, Bottom Loki, Dissociation, Dom/sub, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Femdom, Hand Jobs, Knifeplay, Not Entire Safe or Sane but Absolutely Consensual, Orgasm Denial, Strangulation, Top Natasha Romanov, Vaginal Sex, not entirely healthy bdsm
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-21
Updated: 2017-03-21
Packaged: 2018-10-08 10:11:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10384344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lise/pseuds/Lise
Summary: Natasha and Loki play dangerous games.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I was posting these exclusively on Tumblr, for reasons that make sense only to me, but then I realized that some of them are going to become important in the future of this verse (and there _is_ a future of this verse, I'm working on it), and so I'd better crosspost them over here. Also, some of y'all might enjoy them, I guess. (Hopefully?)
> 
> The chapters are not necessarily in chronological order, but order is not really important for these.

They’d gone one round and she could tell it wasn’t enough, that whatever had led him to call her wasn’t done with. Sitting on the edge of the bed, the red lines of her nails on his pale back, she could still see the tension in him.

Moving over, she dragged her nails down the back of his neck and he arched into it, baring the back of his neck with a small inhale. “You’re not very good at this,” she murmured, letting amusement touch her voice enough to bite. She felt his muscles tense.

“You’re the one giving me what I want, aren’t you?” She let her nails dig in and felt him twitch.

“It’s cute when you pretend you’re in control,” Natasha said. “Or when you pretend you want to be.” She leaned forward and bit his shoulder hard enough to hear him gasp. “Since we both know that’s not the way it is. Is there anyone you _wouldn’t_ bend over for?”

Loki moved fast, that lightning quick motion almost too much for the eye to catch, twisting around and suddenly in her face, teeth bared. “I think you forget who the mortal is here. You are here on _my_ will, fragile, breakable-” She could feel the tension humming in him.

“If I wanted to break you,” she said, quietly, evenly, “I could shatter you like a piece of glass.” She saw his pupils dilate, heard the slight intake of breath, and leaned in. “Is that what you want?”

His expression spasmed, lips parting just a fraction. The expression in Loki’s eyes was sudden and naked yearning, and Natasha felt it pool at the base of her spine, heat and desire and something else, flavored a little like pity.

She pushed it down and reached out to twist one of his nipples between thumb and forefinger. He let out a quiet breath, head dropping back to expose his throat, and she pulled back instead of taking that offering.

“And if…it were?” Loki’s voice was light, a good pretense of careless if she hadn’t been able to see his face, the goosebumps prickling across his chest. “Then…”

Natasha looked at him for a moment, and then shifted forward to straddle his knees and let one of her hands slide out to rest high on his thigh. “Why?” she asked, leaning in with a barbed smile. “Is that a request?” She breathed lightly on his collarbone and felt his body tense and relax.

“I am…curious what you would do.”

Natasha laughed, soft and cruel. “Oh no,” she said. “Not good enough. You’re going to have to ask.” She let her eyes drop down and let her fingers drift ghost-light over the half-hard length of his dick. “I won’t accept less.” His hips moved toward her hand, and she pulled it away quickly.

“Nnh – tease.”

“I don’t know why you’re so slow to admit it,” she said, bluntly, “when we both already _know._ Are you worried about my low opinion of you?” She dug her nails into the top of his thigh and felt his muscles go rigid under her hand.

“Fine,” he said, after a pause, his voice taut. “ _Fine. Break_ me, then, Agent Romanov, if you’re so sure you- _ah._ ”

He shuddered as she slid her hand between his legs and dragged her nails just lightly over his scrotum. She smiled, a little, pressed in hard enough to leave little crescents under the base of his cock, watched him swell and harden as he breathed shallowly, then pulled her fingernails away and wrapped her hand loosely around his cock.

“You sound like you think I can’t do it,” she murmured, conversationally, though she could feel herself getting wet. She was always startled by his responsiveness, how very _sensitive_ he was to the slightest touch. It was…heady, to watch. To feel.

“I’ll…nnnh – believe it when I feel it.”

She tightened her fist and moved her hand in a slow, gentle stroking motion, up and down, and Loki made a sound that wasn’t quite a whine, thrusting against her fist in a silent plea for more. She didn’t give it to him, arousal clenching in the pit of her own stomach. “Ever the skeptic.”

Natasha repeated the motion with a little twist of her hand, easing into a rhythm, letting the pads of her fingers slide over places she knew would make him shudder and twitch. One of his clever hands brushed against her thigh and she swatted it away with a casual, “No,” listening to his breathing quicken, the thrusts of his hips getting more insistent with every too-slow stroke.

“Is this-” Loki’s hands twitched at his sides, curled into fists, and released. “It’s going to take more than this if you want to-” Natasha stopped her hand at his base, and smiled at the noise he made.

“I have a whip,” she said, giving his cock a slow and far too gentle squeeze. Loki made a low sound, his hips pulsing up against her hand, and she smiled coolly. “chains, knives, the whole nine yards. Everything I’d need to cut you into bloody strips, let you heal, and do it again. You’d be hard by the third stroke of the knife, and screaming for me to touch you by the fifth.” She leaned forward, ran her thumb lightly along the vein on the underside of his shaft, listened to the little breathless _huh_ with satisfaction. “I’m not going to do that.”

His hips pushed up toward her hand, but Natasha kept her touch light, refusing to make it more than that. She could feel slick, wet warmth between her legs and slid her free hand down to rub two fingers through her folds. She glanced at Loki’s face, the rapid fluttering of his eyelids. “What…what, then?” He almost breathed.

“Pain is easy for you,” she said, keeping her voice cool even as her fingertips found the right place and she rubbed in little circles around her clitoris, sliding her hand up and rubbing her thumb over the head of Loki’s cock, pushing at the slit until her thumb felt slick with pre-come and Loki’s stomach muscles were twitching with his uneven breaths. “I’m going to do you one better.” She stilled her hand. “I’m going to hold you right up against the edge of release until you can’t stand it anymore and you come apart in pure _pleasure._ ”

She let her thumb rub against the nerve bundle under the head of his cock, pressing in little rhythmic circles until she could feel knew he was close, and then pulled her hand away, went back to light, gentle strokes along his shaft. Loki made a distinct noise of protest, his hips bucking.

“Complaint?” she said sweetly.

“Nn – no,” he said, voice slightly rough edged. Natasha felt her whole body warm and quickened the motion of her fingers. His cock was flushed and swollen, and Loki’s hands scrabbled at the covers, moved to dig his fingers into his own legs.

“Good,” she said. “Then we can keep going.”

She resumed the slow, gentle rhythm of before, keeping the pace just easy enough, the pressure just light enough to keep him dancing on the edge, letting him slide away from it, pushing him back towards it. Her cunt became wetter, the sharp edges blurring a little but not enough to lose focus.

She did pull her fingers away, though, plant her hands on Loki’s shoulders, and shove him down to his back. He fell back without a protest and she reached for the dresser, grabbed the condom off it, and ripped it open.

He stared at her, eyes wide and pupils dilated. “You are a bitch,” Loki said, half compliment, she thought, half invective. Natasha smiled at him.

“And you’re the one lying back and taking it.” She rolled the condom on, feeling him shudder and gasp just for that touch, then shimmied up and took him into her with a small and muffled sound.

Loki’s corresponding noise of sudden, sharp need, with the simultaneous forceful buck of his hips, was significantly less muffled. Natasha took a moment, hands braced on his fluttering stomach, to admire the way he looked under her. Her body throbbed.

“Hnnh – _Natasha-_ ”

“I don’t think you’re done yet,” she said, and started to ride him, moving her hips to rub herself against his body on every downstroke, and it wouldn’t be enough to make her come but it felt _good,_ almost as good as the feeling of Loki slowly coming undone under her as she set the pace and the rhythm and drove him wild, pushing, pushing, _pushing-_

“I need,” Loki said, his fingers curling, every muscle she could see wound taut like a bowstring. “ _need_ – hahnnnh-” and she gyrated her hips to make him inhale sharp like a silent scream.

“Let me,” Loki said, hands coming up to grasp at her thighs, and she pushed one away and brought the other up to bite the flesh between thumb and forefinger hard enough that she half expected to taste blood.

“Enough, that’s – enough, let me,” Loki said, and Natasha just smirked at him and heard his breath catch for the cruelty in it. Her body on fire, she slid her fingers down and pushed herself into orgasm, and the fluttering of her body had Loki arching off the bed with a whine, breathless “close close close,” spilling from his lips. Only moments later, she was on fire again, the new sensitivity only making her want _more._

She felt, precisely, the moment when Loki surrendered.

His whole body was vibrating. His hands were clenched in the sheets and his mouth was open, head arched back, his expression broken open. _“Please!”_ He cried out, voice sharp and full of need. “Please – _damn you_ – please let me – _ah-_ ”

Natasha flexed her pelvic muscles and rolled her hips, just slightly, and relaxed again just as his hips jerked. The sound he made was shattered, his skin sheened with sweat and his chest heaving with deep gulping breaths. “No,” she said, merciless. She reached out and ran her fingers over the pulse hammering visibly in his neck.

“Hhnnnh- Natasha-”

 _Getting there,_ she thought, even as she felt a surge of fresh lust tightening her stomach at the sound of his voice, the sheer, raw, desperation. One last push. One final-

“I could leave you like this,” she murmured. “Tie your hands and leave you rutting against nothing. Maybe I wouldn’t even need to tie your hands. Just my word would be enough. I don’t need to give you pain, do I? Pleasure is far, far worse. Especially when you know that I don’t care. Not even a little.”

She moved her hips in one, long thrust, letting his cock slide free and then taking him deep. “Now come,” she said, and he exploded with a sound like a sob, hips bucking wildly up against her, back arching off the bed. She rode him through it, using her fingers and Loki’s body to rub her over into her own orgasm.

He fell limp, breathing raggedly, still shuddering through the aftershocks. Natasha pulled off of him, peeled off the condom and knotted it, dropping it on the floor for later. It wasn’t her floor, after all. When she looked back, one of Loki’s arms was over his eyes, and she could hear a strange quality to his breathing, almost wet, like he was trying not to cry.

“I told you,” she said, ruthlessly, against the peculiar sensation in her chest. He didn’t deny it, and she moved to stand up. “If you’re done…”

“Wait,” Loki said, like the words were dragged out of him. “Stay.” Natasha froze. “I know…please.” His voice sounded like he was struggling to keep it even, and the arm still over his eyes kept her from reading his expression very well.

After a moment, she stretched out on the bed. “All right,” she said. “For a little while.”

He was still for a few moments longer, and then moved, almost crawling to her, resting his forehead against her shoulder. She could still see his body quivering. He didn’t look at her, or say a word.

After a few moments, she let herself move one hand to run her fingers into his hair, and felt Loki go limp.

Cruelty and kindness, she thought. What a double edged sword.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was written for an anonymous prompt for "being touched anywhere but where they want to be touched."

Natasha pinned his arms over his head almost gently, giving him a small, wicked smile that made Loki’s skin prickle with anticipation. “Do I have to tie you here or can you keep them like this,” she asked, head cocked slightly to the side. Loki knew the right answer.

“I think I can show a little restraint.”

“Glad to hear it.” Her tone was light, but her gaze was intense, sharp. A delicious shiver ran down Loki’s spine. He half closed his eyes and summoned a lazy smile. 

“Anything to please.”

“Mm. Damn right.” She released his wrists, squeezing them once - but not hard. Surprisingly gentle, like her next touch, grazing along his collarbone. “That’s all you want, isn’t it? You fight it, but underneath…a part of you is just _desperate_ for someone to pat you on the head and tell you you’re a good boy.” Loki shuddered, the familiar burn of humiliation starting in his gut, twisted with underlying pleasure. “I know you. Remember?” 

“You know…some things.” 

“I know enough.” Her fingers rested lightly on the hollow between his collarbones, close to his throat, and Loki’s heartbeat picked up with the implicit threat. “More than. Here, let me do you a favor.” She leaned down, her lips curved in a smirk. “You’re being _such_ a _good_ boy.”

The burn rose up higher, into his chest, and Loki heard himself exhale, a soft burst of air he couldn’t (didn’t) hold back. It was, somehow, what he wanted to hear, mocking and all, and hearing it made him want to squirm. He felt Natasha exhale on his face and tilted his head back, not sure if he was offering her his mouth or his throat.

“Am I,” he said, bravado thin on the ground. Natasha hummed.

“Oh, definitely.” Her fingers moved up, curling lightly around his throat, and Loki kept from pressing up into them with an act of will. “And I believe good behavior should be rewarded.”

Loki felt his heart flutter. “Oh?” He said. His voice did not sound so steady as he would have liked.

“Mmhm.” Her thumb stroked lightly down the side of his throat and she shifted slightly, thighs on either side of his waist flexing. “I can be nice.”

Loki heard himself swallow, the bob of his throat pushing against the palm of Natasha’s hand. “I do not ask-”

“Hush,” she said, and it might have been mild but for the gleam in her eye. “You _don’t_ ask. You just let me do what I want with you.” Her hand slid away from his throat and Loki felt the slightest flicker of disappointment. “And pain isn’t the only thing I can do.”

She was making a point, Loki knew. Still, he felt a flicker of unease. “I know that-”

“Be quiet or I’ll gag you,” she said, not sharply. “And we’ll both be disappointed.” Loki felt his breath catch and almost wished that she would - but he didn’t push. Natasha’s hands fanned out over his chest, still covered by the thin layer of his silk shirt. “Always so dressed up. Who’re you trying to impress?”

“Maybe I just like looking well,” Loki said, summoning a smile. Natasha’s fingernails pressed against his skin through his shirt. 

“Wrong,” she said. “This is just as much armor as the other stuff.” She pulled her hands back to start unbuttoning the shirt at the collar. “But you don’t need that right now.”

Loki licked his lips. “Armor, or the shirt?”

Natasha smiled, a crooked little bend of her mouth that made Loki want to kiss her - but that might cross a line. It sometimes did. “Both?” She flicked the last button free and pushed his shirt open to bare his chest. He could feel her eyes appraising and tried not to tense. When she touched him again it was just the lightest touch of her thumb over one of his nipples. Loki closed his eyes, waiting for the bite of thumbnail to follow, but it did not come. Instead she drew gentle circles in a slow spiral outwards.

_What game is this,_ he wanted to ask, but did not quite dare. When she dropped her head and mouthed at the corner of his jaw, Loki could not hold back the shudder that ran through him.

“Tense,” she said, half teasing. Her hands moved up to his shoulders, kneading deep into muscle. 

“I wonder - why,” Loki managed to say, just a touch breathless. Natasha huffed a laugh that was a cold burst of air on the damp spot her mouth had left. She let up on the kneading, hands moving back down to explore his chest, mapping his skin carefully with her fingers. Loki squirmed slightly in anticipation, waiting for the heel side that wasn’t coming. 

“Are you waiting for me to hurt you?” Natasha murmured, voice almost sweet. “Is that what has you wound so tight?” Loki took a shallow breath through his nose. 

“You have rather…departed from the script,” he said, trying to sound wry. Natasha pressed her tongue to the hollow of his throat and licked, a little flick that made Loki want to moan. 

“I _write_ the script,” she murmured. “I told you. You’ve been so _good._ I can recognize that. And reward it.” Her fingers slid down over his stomach and Loki arched up into that touch, just slightly. Natasha pushed him back down and nipped at his neck, a sharp sting that made Loki jerk and quiver even though she soothed it a moment later with another touch of her tongue. “Ah. Don’t get impatient.” 

“Impatient? I would never,” Loki breathed. “Though if you are trying to relax me…”

“I didn’t say that.” Her fingers found the edge of his ribs, traced along it. “I _never_ said I wanted you relaxed.”

“How do you want me,” Loki asked. He could hear the strain in his voice. Natasha’s smile was sharp. 

“I have you how I want you,” she said. She cupped one hand loosely around his neck, then, her other sliding further down Loki’s stomach, past his navel - and then pulled her fingers away, just as Loki’s breath quickened in anticipation. “I always do.”

Something in her voice made Loki shiver. He swallowed hard. “Do I get to know what my reward is to be?” Her gentleness was making him…edgy. Surely she would know better than to think he would appreciate kindness.

“No,” Natasha said brightly. “You don’t.” Her tongue flicked at his pulse, traced spirals down his neck. Loki shifted under her, hands twitching with the urge to slid his hands up her thighs. He kept them still, above his head. “Don’t you look pretty,” she said, and Loki felt a small burst of warmth, again twinned with humiliation. Her fingers trailed across his chest again and she flicked one of his nipples, just lightly enough to make his nerves buzz. “And holding still so well…”

She pulled back and sat up, pulling her shirt off over her head and dropping it on the floor. She rocked her hips forward and back and he could feel the heat of her sex where she rubbed against his stomach. He pushed up against her and she pushed him back down. 

Natasha studied him, a small smirk playing around the corners of her mouth. “I could blow you,” she said, a faint gleam in her eyes. “I haven’t done that, have I?” Loki pictured her between his legs, mouth wrapped around him, and heard himself make a faint noise. 

“Are you - asking me?” 

“Maybe I am.” She moved, hands exploring his abdomen, sliding down to flick open the button of his trousers, the palm of her hand hovering just above the bulge of his aching cock. “What would you say?” 

It was hard to think. There was probably a right answer to that question. “I would say - it was up to you, my lady.” She drew down the zipper, fingers close, so close. “As you - you remarked…the reins are yours.” 

“Good answer.” Natasha hummed. Her fingers moved away and Loki bit back a whine, even as she stretched out over him, fingers sliding into his hair and pulling his mouth against hers, her tongue pushing against his, lazy and demanding. He twisted, squirming, and moaned into her mouth.

“What,” she murmured. “Something the matter?” He could hear the laughter in her voice and closed his eyes. 

“I thought - you were rewarding me.”

“Aren’t I?” She asked, and dragged her fingernails across his scalp. He felt it like a vibration through his body, the circuit completed by the gentle spirals she drew on his side, and both seemed to go straight to his cock. He could feel the damp spot where he’d begun to leak into his underclothes. 

“Natasha,” he said, a little breathless. She bent down and breathed in his ear, “trust me,” and Loki shivered.

_I do,_ he thought, and it terrified him for a moment before her lips closed warm on his earlobe and she sucked. He felt an answering tug in his loins and closed his eyes as his hips bucked up. She bore down and he could feel her, wet even through the thin layer of cloth that covered her. He licked his lips.

“If you let me move my hands - I could touch you.”

“Oh, you will,” Natasha assured him, something in her voice that made Loki shiver. “After I’m through with you. If you’re very good maybe I’ll even let you fuck me.” Loki bit his lip so he didn’t whimper at the vivid, delightful image of riding her, her hands twisting in his hair and crying out with each thrust. Her thumb found the corner of his mouth and Loki turned his head to suck on it without thinking, wrapping his tongue around the digit until he heard her breath catch.

“Lift your hips,” she order, pulling her hand away, and Loki obeyed without hesitation. Natasha unseated herself to strip him, pulling both pants and underthings down and casting them to the floor. Her eyes appraised him, fingers sliding up his leg. Loki tensed, breath quickening, but her trail stopped and she tapped lightly at the sensitive skin at the very apex of his thigh. Loki’s cock throbbed.

“Please,” burst out of him. 

“Already?” She murmured, and Loki felt his face heat. “Begging so soon?”

“I am not-”

“Ah,” she said, a stern note entering her voice. “Don’t lie.” Loki pressed his lips together. _Just touch me,_ he wanted to say. 

He had feared she was going to be _kind._

Natasha’s thumb pushed into the crease of his thigh and then pulled away. She mounted him again, dropping her head down and sucking hard at his throat. Loki let his head fall back and panted, feeling her touch what seemed like everywhere but where he needed it most. His fingers twitched and spasmed but he forced himself to keep his hands where they were. His nerves felt so sensitive that even the touch of her breath made him jerk violently. “Na-tasha,” he said, voice strained, and heard her laugh. 

“What?” She asked, sweetly - though he could feel dampness on his stomach and hear the slight thickness in her voice, attesting to the fact that she was not unaffected. “Is there something you need?” Her fingers brushed across his hip, trailing inward. He sucked in a breath, fingers curling into fists and body rigid. He could _almost_ feel her touch, imagine how it would feel. He clamped his lips together and sucked in a breath through his nose.

Natasha traced his collarbone with her tongue and then shifted lower, sucking kisses trailing over his chest, too light to satisfy. When her tongue flicked the bud of one of his nipples a cry burst from him, an almost painful jolt traveling down into his belly, his hips thrusting up. For just a second he felt his cock against her but then she shoved him ruthlessly back down, moving deftly so even as her mouth pressed below his sternum she gave him nothing. Her hands pressed where he could feel the knot of need, just above his cock, and Loki heard himself make a faint whining sound as his eyes slammed closed.

“There’s more than one way to take you apart, see,” Natasha murmured. Her hands were close, so close - and her mouth, her breath hot and damp. He breathed in short, harsh bursts, body so tense he was almost vibrating. “I don’t have to hurt you.”

“Please,” he heard himself say, willpower cracking. “Please, _please-”_

“Please what,” she said, and he could feel the air of it on his aching cock, could hear the sound of laughter in her voice. Shame bit at him, made him feel dizzy even as pleasure knotted in his gut.

“Touch me,” he said, breathless. Natasha’s fingers ghosted over his hipbone and Loki shuddered violently.

“Haven’t I been?” Loki let out a thin whine, a desperate, almost pained sound. “Shh,” she said, voice softer, laughter fading out. “I’ve got you. So _good._ ”

He forced his eyes open to look at her, mouth hovering over him. Her lips quirked and Loki sucked in a breath. 

She exhaled, tongue just a hairs-breadth from contact, and two of her fingers slid across the smooth skin behind his testicles and pressed down. It shouldn’t have been enough. It was.

Loki let out a sound that was almost a wail and arched off the bed, orgasm coming fast and hard and _gloriously_ intense. His eyes fluttered between closed and open but unseeing. _I’ve got you. So good._

He went limp slowly. Natasha was sitting up over him, a faint pleased smile on her lips and her hand inside her underwear. He gazed at her, nearly helpless.

“Very good,” she said, and Loki couldn’t help a little shiver at the tone of her voice. Her lips curled up at the corners, and she pulled her hand back. He could see a wet shine on her fingers. “Now. I think I can let you use your hands.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one was originally for a prompt of a healthy BDSM relationship, which this is...not, yet. So that was kind of a failure. Asphyxiation, orgasm denial, and some hints toward the future direction of this verse.

_I require assistance._ The words themselves were relatively innocuous, but their presence was alarming enough. There were two things Loki never did: both in contactingher so directly and asking for help - for anything. 

It had brought her running - well, figuratively speaking - to the small apartment they’d set up as a meeting place. She let herself in and Loki wheeled to face her, stopping short mid-pace. Natasha felt herself coil tight and braced herself, planting her feet. The look on his face was…unhinged, almost vibrating with tension. 

“Loki,” she said, keeping her voice neutral and calm. She could see his chest moving with his shallow breaths. So, on the verge of panic. Natasha closed the door quietly and otherwise didn’t move, aware that she was cutting off her best escape route as she did so. 

“Natasha,” he said, more of an exhalation than speech. He took a step toward her only to stop, his throat working. Natasha examined his face again, the tension in his body. 

“Something happened,” she said, not really a question. 

Loki’s jaw shifted. “I do not wish to discuss it.” 

“Too bad,” she said, ruthlessly. His expression flickered. 

“Please don’t - not now. Do not ask me to - not now.” He turned away and started pacing again. “I am not - _safe_. Just now. I do not think - if I am alone I do not trust what I might do.” Natasha hesitated, and Loki took a ragged breath. “ _Please._ ”

_Dammit._ Natasha resisted the urge to rub a hand over her eyes. 

"All right,” she said slowly. “I’ll stay.”

Loki let out an explosive breath of relief, shoulders sagging forward, though only for a moment and even then he was still strung tight as a wire. “Thank you. I do not ask-“

“Come here.”

Loki turned toward her, face flickering between wariness and surprise. “Why?” 

Natasha took a step forward. “Because I said so.”

She saw the shiver run down his spine. He shifted, licked his lips, and then obeyed, approaching almost gingerly, movements tense and too controlled. She reached out and touched his jaw, ran her fingers lightly down the side of his neck, and pulled away.

“I’m going to sit down on the couch,” she said. “You’re going to kneel on the floor, and we’re just going to sit like that, all right?” Loki’s eyes met hers and then moved away. She didn’t wait for him to answer. “With me." 

She affected carelessness as she walked across the room, trying not to think too hard about the danger of having a Loki who called _himself_ ‘not safe’ at her back. She settled down on the couch without incident, though, and after a moment she heard Loki move. He stood next to her, frozen. “Down,” Natasha said, a little more firmly, but she was still almost surprised when he dropped heavily to his knees on the floor and settled there, breathing still strained and shallow. Natasha reached out without looking in his direction and ran her fingers into his hair. 

Loki shuddered, making a small noise in the back of his throat. He didn’t relax, exactly, but he didn’t tense either, and when Natasha cast a sidelong look in his direction his eyes were closed. 

"Good,” she said, voice still level, letting her fingernails trail across his scalp. “You’re doing very well.” Loki’s head leaned barely perceptibly into her hand and Natasha twisted her hand to give his hair a light tug. The shallowness of his breathing, though… “Loki,” she said slowly, “slow your breathing for me." 

He made a shuddery, uncertain sort of sound. “I cannot.” 

"That’s not true,” Natasha said, quiet but firm. “I know you can. It might not feel-”

“That’s not it,” he interrupted. “I cannot - I can _not._ There isn’t room, I’ll crack open.” She could hear him starting to rise toward panic and gave his hair another tug, hoping the sharp pain would ground him. 

"Loki,” she said a little more sharply. “I’m not lying to you. I wouldn’t lie to you.”

Loki’s head fell forward, his forehead resting against her knee. His shoulders were shaking. “Yes, you would,” he said, more of a moan than an accusation. Natasha felt a pang. 

“No,” she said. “Not right now. I wouldn’t.” She was a little surprised herself to find it was the truth. But Loki…he wasn’t calming, not really. Leaned against her leg with her fingers in his hair…but it wasn’t enough. “Loki,” she said lowly, “I need you to tell me what you need from me.”

His laugh was cracked and a little wild. “A swift death,” he said, rocking. “A knife between my shoulder blades. That kindness-“

“I told you,” she said, and heard a harsh note enter her voice. “The first time you came to me, I told you. I’m not your executioner.” Loki made another of those shuddery sounds that might have been a laugh or a sob, and Natasha tried to think. She didn’t know this mood. She couldn’t be certain what would help. But then, she could never be certain. 

Natasha slipped her shoes off and shifted so she could slide her bare foot up and down his thigh. She felt muscle tense, and when she reached the groove of his hip she let her toes slide inward, massaging gently until Loki let out a faint whine. 

“Do you want me to stop?” She asked softly. 

“Nn- no.” Loki’s voice was barely audible, his face still hidden in her knee. “You could - press harder." 

She didn’t. Natasha kept the pressure of her foot, toes and balls of her feet, light and gentle. Loki’s hips moved, another soft “nnh” noise escaping him, his cock beginning to respond. “I could just keep doing this for a while,” she murmured. “I could probably get you off with nothing but my foot. Make you come in your pants.” Another night, she might have said something about _making a mess of yourself,_ something to emphasize the potential humiliation. But right now…she wouldn’t. She didn’t want to. 

Loki’s shoulders seized up but he didn’t make a sound, just rocked his hips into the slight pressure of her foot, making nothing but the smallest of gasping noises. A bit of an idea was percolating in Natasha’s mind and she rolled it over a few times before pulling her foot back and using the hand in Loki’s hair to pull his head away from her knee so she could look him in the face.

"Look at me,” she said, and his eyes, pupils dilated and faintly glazed, focused on her slowly. “I’m going to go get something. I want you to take your clothes off and lie down on the couch.”

Loki licked his lips. “Go - how long?” His voice was hoarse. Natasha released her hold on his hair and ran her fingers through again, soothingly. 

“Just a minute,” she said. “But I want you to be naked when I do come back.”

His breathing was short and halting. “Or?” 

“No or,” Natasha said. “I’m not going to punish you tonight.”

“What if - I want you to punish me,” Loki said, something faintly desperate, hurt and vulnerable briefly appearing in his gaze. Natasha met his eyes squarely.

“I’m not going to punish you tonight,” she said again. “I’m in charge. And that means I get to make that call.” She pulled her hand out of his hair and stood. “Now get undressed.”

She waited for Loki to respond, to shift and reach for the fastenings of his clothes, before she turned and walked for the bedroom. Natasha fished the box of toys out of the closet and found what she was looking for at the bottom. She took a little longer than necessary, giving Loki time, and was both mildly surprised and pleased when she emerged to find him stretched out on the couch and naked from head to toe. Not as bad as she’d feared, then. 

Natasha walked over and held up the black ring she’d taken from the box in Loki’s field of vision. “Do you know what this is?” 

Loki licked his lips again. “I have - a guess.”

Natasha slid three fingers into the ring and stretched it, keeping her eyes on Loki’s. “Mmhm.” She drew a little closer, watching his expression, the cues of his body. There were goosebumps pebbling on his chest. She thought about pressing him to give her a safe word, but decided there wouldn’t be any point. He wouldn’t use it, more than likely. Loki didn’t have lines, even when he should. 

Natasha climbed onto the couch, straddling Loki’s legs, and let her eyes drop from his to trail down to his cock. It was flushed and curved up toward his stomach, but not so hard as she knew he could be. She wrapped her hand loosely around him and squeezed so he jumped under her, stretching the cock ring in her other hand. 

“If you know what it does then you know what I’m going to do with you,” she murmured, tracing the vein on the underside of his penis with her thumb. Loki’s head lifted and fell back down, his stomach muscles tensed. She loosened her grip and slid her hand up to push back his foreskin, clear pre-cum welling up under her fingers. Loki shuddered and made a sound that was quickly bitten off. 

“I - I can-” Loki broke off, squirming as she explored the contours of his cock with too light a touch. He groaned, low in his chest, still locked tight with tension. Natasha released him, stretching the cock ring once more before putting it on him, around his balls and cock both, snug around the base but not digging in. Loki’s hips bucked and she pushed them back down. 

“Stay,” she said, quiet but firm. Holding back on the ruthlessness for now. “I have control over when you come, now. _If_ you come.” Loki’s eyes closed and he panted, short and ragged. Natasha tweaked his nipples, first one and then the other, then leaned forward and closed her teeth lightly on one of the erect buds. Loki yelped, his body going taut, and she could feel him grinding up against her, erection pressing into her stomach. After a moment’s consideration she sat up, stripped off her shirt, and dropped back down, this time using her tongue to draw circles around Loki’s nipples one at a time, savoring the way he twitched with each small lick. His hands moved to her hips, pulling her against him as he moved, making little more than small “hnnh” noises. _Good,_ Natasha thought, in a calculating corner of her brain not distracted by the heat between her legs and the taste of sweat on Loki’s skin, _but not good enough._

She was going to have to push him harder.

“Sit up,” she said, pulling back and moving away from him. She left her bra on, but shed her pants, too. Loki obeyed, his breathing shallow and hitching on every inhale. Once he was upright she straddled him again, wrapping her hand around his shaft and rubbing her thumb in circles over the head of his cock. The sound he made low in his chest vibrated through her.

"Natasha,” he breathed, and she could feel his whole body coiling tight. She ran her hand up his chest and rested her palm lightly on his throat, and felt him fall utterly still, perfectly frozen. 

“Do you want me to?” She asked, keeping her voice quiet. Loki’s head tipped back, presenting for her. 

“Yes.”

“Give me a signal.” It wasn’t a question. She watched his face twitch. 

“I do not-”

“It wasn’t a request, Loki. Give me a signal for when I need to stop and a promise you’ll use it.” She let her palm press a little harder and when he leaned into it pulled away. “Promise me.”

Loki’s eyes closed. “I…promise it. I will squeeze your wrist twice if I…need you to stop.”

“And that means before you pass out,” she pressed. She jerked his cock in a quick, almost rough stroke, making him gasp and focusing his attention on her again. “You understand?" 

"I…understand.” His hips tried to thrust into her hand; his skin was flushed brighter now, and hot against her palm. “Please-”

“Not yet.” Natasha set to stroking him in rhythm, using the pre-ejactulate leaking from his slit to slick her grip, setting a steady pace. She knew what he liked, knew where to squeeze and where to brush her fingers more lightly, and it didn’t take long to have him nearly frantic, moaning and squirming, his eyes slits and head lolled back but breathing hard and fast. A glance down showed his cock an angry red, his stomach muscles taut. 

“ _Natasha-_ ” he said, a voiced moan. She pressed a hand into his chest, trying to ignore the heat in her low belly.

“Asking for something?” She murmured, and released Loki’s cock to run her fingers lightly over his balls. He quivered violently and let out a bitten off cry. 

“I want - you know, you know what I - hnnh, _hh._ ” Loki’s eyes squeezed closed and he thumped his head against the back of the couch. “I need-”

She slid her fingers back up around his throat and he broke off. She could see his pulse hammering in his neck. “You need what you always need,” Natasha said, keeping her voice to a murmur. “For someone else to control you. To be your master.” She cupped his balls in her hand for a moment and then pulled away from his genitals altogether. “Now." 

Loki’s head tipped back in offering. Her hand looked small around his throat but it was large enough and she knew where to push, digging thumb and forefingers into the carotid on either side where it would cut off oxygen to the brain, the rest of her hand pressing against the hard ridge of the trachea, just enough to trigger the reflex. If she were truly trying to kill someone, she wouldn’t do it like this, but it was enough for what she (he) needed.

Loki gasped, choked, and his eyes opened wide, his nostrils flaring. Natasha kept the pressure constant, only releasing when his eyelids started to flutter. Loki gasped, sucking in air. She gave him three breaths before squeezing again.

He struggled reflexively, body bucking when his lungs wouldn’t inflate, but it was little more than reflex. Natasha could feel her heart pounding and made herself release. This time Loki’s breathing was more ragged, more strained. 

Natasha brought both her hands up to his neck and locked them around Loki’s throat, fingers fanned out and thumbs overlapping, and clamped down. 

His hands flew to her arms, but didn’t pull, just wrapped around her wrists. His eyes opened wide and stared at her, mouth opening. She counted the seconds. Ten to unconsciousness in a human with the carotid compressed like she was doing right now. She reached fifteen before Loki’s fingers started to loosen, eyelids falling, but didn’t release. _Come on,_ she thought. _Come on._

She could feel him slipping. Natasha’s heart was pounding in her ears, still counting. _Eighteen, nineteen._ In a human he’d be approaching the cessation of electrical activity, followed shortly by death. She could still feel Loki’s pulse fluttering against her hands, but-

A squeeze of her wrist, barely. Once, twice, and Natasha let go with an explosive release of a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. Loki coughed raggedly, sucked in a breath, and coughed again. His eyes fluttered between open and closed, head lolling on his neck. 

Natasha reached down between his legs and removed the cock ring. Her fingers brushed his cock and Loki made a cracked sound that might have been a cry. When she wrapped her fingers around him it only took one or two strokes before he came almost silently, semen painting white stripes on his stomach.

He was limp and pliant, body almost liquid as she wiped her hand off on his chest. He moved his arms like they were heavy to touch her shoulders, her waist, though he didn’t pull her to himself. Natasha didn’t try to pull away, instead running her fingers back into Loki’s hair, letting him feel her touch. 

"You used the signal,” she said. “I’m proud of you.” Loki’s head bobbed vaguely. “You were good,” she repeated, and he made a shuddery kind of whine. 

“Natasha,” he said, voice roughened. She wondered how long his throat would ache. “I…thank you. I needed…” He trailed off. 

“I know.” She leaned in, but not to kiss him. That was a line they still hadn’t crossed. “You can make it up to me. It’s been a while since I had you use your tongue.”

“I will,” Loki said, almost with a kind of fervency. “Tenfold. You deserve-” He stopped. Tongue loosened, but not that much. Natasha brushed her fingers along the line of his jaw and his eyes closed. 

“Good,” she said. “I’ll hold you to that.” His eyes closed to slits, lips parting, and the breathy sound he made was almost a moan. 

_I own you now,_ Natasha thought, but it was less with triumph than something else; something she feared might be far more dangerous than simple pride.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written for a prompt of something going wrong during a session between Natasha and Loki where Loki ends up triggered by something. **Warnings** for unsafe drug use, unsafe BDSM, and as I said in the originally prompt, "generally unsafe." 
> 
> Don't try this at home, kids.

Natasha placed the little bottle on the counter with what was clearly a deliberate air of challenge. Loki took it, lifting his eyebrows very slightly. “What is this?” 

“Something the lab cooked up,” she said. “Addressing the problem of how you deal with superhumans who could pop Advil all day to no effect.”

Interesting, he thought privately. Not sure if the prickle he felt down his spine was wary or intrigued. “And this is relevant to me because…?”

She smiled at him. “Have you ever gotten high?” Loki frowned, and she added, “an altered state of mind usually caused by drugs.”

Loki wondered what she would think of the ecstasies that were occasionally a side effect of overextension of magical ability. “No,” he said, simply.

“Well.” Natasha nodded at the bottle. “Now’s your chance.“ Loki weighed the bottle in his hand. This substance could do anything - or nothing. Natasha might intend to kill him - or worse. She gave him a moment to hesitate and then stepped toward him, smile sharpening. “Let me put it this way. Everything I can normally make you feel? Odds are, this is going to make it more intense.” 

Loki eyed her. _And?_ He thought, with a peculiar urge to laugh. _What does it matter? Isn’t this what you come to her for? The_ danger? He flicked the stopper out of the bottle and tossed it back like a shot of liquor. There was a faint, sour taste, but it was very brief. Natasha looked surprised, and he felt a small pulse of satisfaction at managing that.

“More intense,” he said, with a smile that was just a little wild. “I like more intense.”

Natasha cocked her head to the side, then smiled. “Good,” she said. “Let’s see how you handle.”

* * *

His muscles felt liquid, almost useless. Natasha’s fingers ran over his ribs and he shuddered, the feeling amplified so it was like each of her fingertips was the stroke of a very fine blade and he expected blood to follow her touch. He heard himself make a sound, a whine.

“Good,” he heard her murmur. “That’s good.” His heart pounded outside of his chest and his head spun. Every brush of air sang against his skin and how was this meant to _ease_ pain? Perhaps that had been a lie, or perhaps it didn’t work, or affected him differently-

Natasha breathed on his neck and Loki shuddered as much as he could with his muscles barely responding to his commands. He panted, and Natasha’s palm rested on his throat, instinctual terror surging as her fingers caressed over his pulse. Her fingers slipped away and Loki opened his eyes with a noise of protest. 

“How do you feel,” she asked, and Loki let out a shuddering exhale. Loki struggled to find the words. 

“Like I am floating,” he said at length. “Like - mmm.” He trailed off as her fingers skated over his collarbone, just a trace of fingernails against skin. He opened his eyes to look at her straddling him, a gleam in her eyes that made Loki’s heart pound and his stomach clench. He could not tell how long it had been. The bed under him seemed to roll like a boat on the waves. 

“Look at you,” she murmured. “So vulnerable. So _helpless._ I could do anything to you. Anything at all.”

Loki felt himself quiver, though this time the frisson did not feel entirely pleasurable, the touch of fear a little sharper. “Isn’t that. Isn’t that always true?” 

“Not like this.” Her hand rested lightly on his stomach, fingers splayed wide. “Usually we both know that if you wanted you could stop me. But now, like this…” Her smile was soft. Her eyes were not. Loki made a small noise. She took one of his hands and brought it between her legs, where he could feel her wet heat even through her underwear. “I’d better have you take care of this before you’re completely useless,” Natasha murmured, and Loki closed his eyes, something buzzing like a hive of wasps in his abdomen. 

He slid his hand into her underwear and stroked her, felt a warm burst of satisfaction at her voiced “ _ah”_ and the way she caught herself on his shoulder, fingers digging in. His fingers felt clumsy but even so apparently it was good enough, gathering wet from the core of her and dragging his fingers forward until he found the spot that made her gasp, stroking a slick fingertip over her clit again and again. He tried to keep his eyes open, to watch the way she danced on his hand, but his head was too heavy to hold up and he let it fall back, panting, dizzy. He felt each of her moans echoed by tightening in his loins and warmth in his belly, the brief disquiet fading in the face of arousal. 

He knew when she came, the shift from frantic gasps to heaving breaths, and lightened his touch, unable to keep from smiling with slightly smug satisfaction. He was taken utterly off guard by the sharp sting of her slapping him. He opened his eyes and stared at her. “You don’t get to smirk for doing exactly what you’re supposed to,” she said, and Loki’s stomach lurched. 

He swallowed hard. “I am not allowed to - to be pleased with a job well done?” His tongue felt thick. 

“Not unless I tell you to be.” Something shivered through him again, and Loki felt himself whimper. This time she took both his wrists and pulled his hands over his head, movement sharp and sudden. Something clicked shut around his wrists, one then the other. His breathing hitched and his heart felt like it was racing. 

“N-Natasha,” he said, but broke off with a gasp when her hand closed around his neck. Not squeezing, or even threatening, just because she could, because she owned him and they both knew it. 

“I don’t think you could free yourself,” she murmured, bending down to breathe on his ear. Loki exhaled, shuddering, and she sucked his earlobe into her mouth and bit down. He slammed his eyes closed and cried out. His heartbeat was thudding in his ears and he twisted his head to the side, nearly whimpering. She stroked his face, his neck. “Shh,” she said, and Loki clamped his lips together, forcing his eyes back open. Focusing on her face, her voice. 

Afraid of what might happen if he didn’t. 

She reached over and picked something up. He didn’t realize what it was until she raised it in front of his eyes and unfolded the blade with a quiet _snick._ “What do you think this will feel like?”She asked, lowering it to press the cold flat of the metal against the pulse in his neck. His eyes widened and he held very still. “When you’re this sensitive. Imagine how it would feel if I stabbed it into your side and twisted.”

“Nnnh,” Loki said, inhaling in a gasp. His body felt taut as a bowstring, shaking. He could feel - something. “Please,” he heard himself say.

“Please, what?” She asked, but Loki clamped his lips shut, suddenly certain that it would not matter what he asked, it never mattered-

She brushed her fingers across his stomach again, pulled the knife away from his neck only to put the tip of it to skin just above his navel, barely pricking him. “I could,” she murmured. “You’d heal.”

Loki closed his eyes, breath coming in little pants. _Please,_ he thought again, but this time didn’t say it. Couldn’t. He needed to stay quiet. 

“Should I?” Loki inhaled, short, ragged breaths. His head was spinning. “Loki.” Her voice vibrated in his bones. “Answer me.” _Answer me._ No, Loki thought. _No._

“I don’t - I don’t know,” he forced out. Not sure of the right answer. Maybe there wasn’t one, the game was rigged and this was all part of, part of-

“Do you want me to?” She sounded almost gentle. Loki twisted against the bonds holding him, or tried, but his arms wouldn’t answer. His head felt light and he couldn’t _think_ but he knew the answer to that. Gasped raggedly. 

“Yes,” he said, trying to be ready so he didn’t-

scream, he did scream, clamped his mouth closed a moment too late. It was like the moment stretched, aware of every separate moment of the small blade cutting into him and he didn’t, didn’t want, the buzzing was back but this time in his head, it was _in his head._

His body seized and he whimpered, a shameful sound squeezed from his lungs. “How does that feel?” Natasha’s voice sounded distorted, strange. Loki licked his lips and opened his mouth to try to answer, but he couldn’t find the words. His breathing quickened, fear spiking because he was failing, he wasn’t answering the question. He heard himself whimper.

“Loki?” The tone of her voice changed. He flinched, though, because it was another question and he could not find his voice. His throat closed and he gasped for air that didn’t seem to fill his lungs. “Shit,” he heard somewhere, and then fingertips on his neck. He flinched. “Loki,” Natasha said (Natasha, but it wasn’t, or it was but that didn’t matter, all the same). “Can you look at me?” 

He shook his head, mute. Expected a demand, or pain, and held his breath in the pause. 

“Okay,” she said, after a moment. “That’s fine. I’m just going to lie down with you, all right?” 

Loki heard himself make a small sound. Something had changed in her voice but he didn’t know what that _meant,_ not until he felt her move and stretch out beside him. She reached up and he flinched, but it was only to release whatever was holding his arms. He let them fall, limp.

“Do you hear me breathing?” She asked softly. “I want you to match my breathing, Loki.” He felt himself twitch, and as if he’d spoken she said, “I know you can do it. Listen: in…” 

He forced air into his lungs, held it. He felt like he was going to vibrate out of his skin. Natasha’s hand brushed his hip and he flinched, but she left it there. “Out,” she said, and Loki released his held breath in a rush. “There,” she said. “There, that’s good. Turn on your side.” 

He obeyed without thinking, dropping his head forward, and she draped an arm over his waist and spooned against his back. He tensed as her body pressed against his, but she fell still. He could feel himself shaking against her and couldn’t stop. He felt cold all over except for the hot pain of the still fresh wound.

“Loki,” Natasha said, her voice still quiet, level. “Are you with me?”

He swallowed hard, several times, and worked some moisture into his mouth. “Uh,” he said, not quite able to connect his brain to his mouth. His brain still felt fuzzy, full of static. Like after _he’d_ cracked it open and rummaged through. His breathing quickened, shortening again.

“It’s fine, you’re fine,” Natasha said, her thumb rubbing a little circle above his hip bone. “That’s good.” Loki shuddered again and heard himself let out a whimper only to clamp his lips closed a moment too late. She didn’t comment, though, or tell him to hush. Just kept rubbing the same circle, and the tension gradually bled away. What followed were tears. and the shame that came with them.

“Should’ve known,” Natasha said. “Should’ve…shit.” It didn’t sound like she was really talking to him, or really expected a response. “Loki? Can you talk to me?” 

“Hmm-mm,” he said, though he wasn’t entirely certain.

“Were you okay before I got the knife out?” Loki hesitated, not sure how to answer. No? Yes? “So that’s a no,” Natasha murmured. “God - can you tell me what set you off?” 

Loki blinked, sluggishly. She sighed. “Okay. We can talk later. Okay.” He felt her rest her forehead against his back, briefly. “I’m going to get you some water and a washcloth to clean you up with. I’ll be right back.” He nodded, though the moment she pulled away he felt cold, lost. He curled into himself, shivering.

She came back soon, though, wiping his stomach clean of blood with a warm, damp washcloth and then helping him sit up enough that he could drink some from the glass she pressed into his hand. He was weak, shaky, almost woozy, even on top of the disorientation and sensitivity from the drug.

“I’m sorry,” she said, at length. “I screwed up.”

Loki shook his head. “Fine,” he managed. 

She sighed. “No,” she said quietly. “It’s really not. This is why…” She trailed off. “I should’ve known,” she said again. “Should’ve been able to tell…”

Loki wasn’t sure what she was trying to say. He closed his eyes, still too limp to do anything but lie there. He knew he needed to leave, but he did not want to, and at least for the moment Natasha wasn’t telling him to. He curved his spine to press into her belly and imagined he felt her lips brush the back of his neck.

“Do you need me to leave,” he managed to mumble eventually. 

“No,” Natasha said, after the briefest pause. “You can stay.”


End file.
